"Food was a constant topic of conversation in our household.". Q. What a stupid question. You had a fight, and your mothers told you to kiss and make up. Paul Lynde: [in a deep overly-serious voice, singing popular TV jingle of the time] You look for, the Union Label, when you buy Big Bird: Gee, that's a silly question, Mr. Marshmallow. ~ (Paul Lynde), I cant even get three weeks off to have cosmetic surgery. Peter Marshall: True or false, Paul Revere had 16 children? - Peter Marshall from the Thursday episode of Game Show Week, Part 1; where he hosted the front game for a day (he was the Center Square the entire week), "And (this time,) (X/Circle starts) the (first) Secret Square (is/for) (insert list of prizes). Joan Rivers: And how his secretary is a guy! He has a new best seller about another stopover point. Im the Founder of Internet Pillar. But I'm not college educated; I don't know rules of grammar. Nice to have you with us. - (1980-1981), "Celebrity guests are briefed as to question subject material prior to program." Paul Lynde: No, but I have to be terribly careful when I do my ironing. / What shall we do with the drunken sailor? There are boys screwing for the right reasons and boys screwing for the wrong ones. This contains the Hollywood Squares montage I created for the 01/10/2021 episode of Richard Skipper Celebrates honoring Paul Lynde available in full here: https://youtu.be/XDleB0_RnNk Show. [singing] What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Peter Marshall: Paul, any good sailor knows that when a man falls off a ship you yell 'Man overboard!' Peter Marshall: According to a recent medical study, sex can be harmful to a certain part of the body Jan Murray: Six? What did the Straw Man want? Peter Marshall: What are "dual-purpose cattle" good for that other cattle aren't? Whoever wins the most money and the end of the show will have a chance to drive away in one of these beautiful (insert car brand) (cheers and whistles) we tossed a coin backstage, (insert player) won the toss, (or) as always our challenger goes first, that's you (insert player), so you get to pick a square!" "But since I can hardly hand out a questionnaire as regards their experiences in that regard, we'll have to leave it there. a prize package worth (insert exact amount in U.S. They are The New Hollywood Squares! ~ (Paul Lynde). Paul Lynde: They give milk . Anne Truitt, I flinch. All Rights Reserved. Paul Lynde had been a regular panelist on Hollywood Squares since 1966, as he was a popular character actor at the time, perhaps best known at the time for a series of appearances on the TV show, Bewitched, as Uncle Arthur, Samantha Stephens' warlock uncle, but as Hollywood Squares host Peter Marshall later recalled, "A writer on the show, Bill Armstrong, became producer and he said, Lets write jokes for Paul Lynde. And that changed everything. Your robe, your slippers Witchiepoo: Mr. Lynde, I've been dying to meet you. ~ (Paul Lynde).if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[336,280],'internetpillar_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_9',190,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-internetpillar_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0'); My following is straight. Big Bird: [describing Oscar the Grouch] He may be grouchy on the outside, but inside beats a heart of stone. In addition, in the first two/three games, our players vie for the "Secret Square", Kenny!" - Kenny Williams (describing the prizes for the Secret Square game), "Let's show our/the audience/folks at home who that/the 'Secret Square' is!" and cookies, but I don't recommend the cookies 4. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant . Fool, who needs her when you - when you've got you! We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Should you try to break him of his habit? Peter Marshall: What do most dentists say you should do with your dentures when you go to bed? Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough. Peter Marshall: Charley, what do you call a pig that weighs more than 150 pounds? So she let it out, and I went as the Hindenburg. Paul Lynde: [excitedly] HEY, CULLIGAN MAN! And Other Amazing Comic Book Trivia! Debbie Reynolds, and Shelley Winters star in the movie, 'What's The Matter With Helen?' Who plays Helen? ~ (Paul Lynde)if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'internetpillar_com-leader-2','ezslot_15',194,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-internetpillar_com-leader-2-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'internetpillar_com-leader-2','ezslot_16',194,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-internetpillar_com-leader-2-0_1');.leader-2-multi-194{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:15px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:15px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;min-width:250px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}, Mothers dont want to pinch me or put me in their purse. What a stupid question. "I guess, then, I hate you for being so helpless. ~ (Paul Lynde), Someday Im going to go onstage in a dress if I want to. -(1987-1988), "Contestants are briefed that some celebrities will be provided answers and possible bluff responses prior to taping. -Tom Bergeron's closing (1998-2004, also the take care part was shown on both Bergeron's other shows, DWTS and AFV), "This is Jeffrey Tambor, the voice of Hollywood Squares, saying so long!" Continue with Recommended Cookies. Peter Marshall: According to Tony Randall, "Every woman I've been intimate with in my life has been" what? Peter Marshall: Can you get a closer shave in the morning or in the evening? True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years. Not ever. ], 2000-2002 Opening Question: CELEBRITY: "One of the celebrities/stars was (insert question)? [Cox was voice of Underdog for the duration of the cartoon's airings]. According to "Cosmo," will you probably be helped in overcoming your shyness by choosing an extroverted, outgoing husband? The winner of each game will receive $500 in cash and something new onThe Hollywood Squares. According to experts you should loosen her clothing, and do one other thing. That's how they get the square. . The audience and panel erupts into laughter]. Good, because in Yugoslavia your prize would be called, "Five thousand American dollars". Paul Lynde had a net worth of over $7 Million at the time of his death. Paul Lynde had been a regular panelist on Hollywood Squares since 1966, as he was a popular character actor at the time, perhaps best known at the time for a series of appearances on the TV show, Bewitched, as Uncle Arthur, Samantha Stephens' warlock uncle, but as Hollywood Squares host Peter Marshall later recalled, "A writer on the show, Bill Armstrong, became producer and he said, 'Let's write jokes for Paul Lynde.'. Peter Marshall: Uh, no, Big Bird, that's Marshall, Mr. Marshall. ~ (Paul Lynde). There are boys who clutch secrets at night in the same way they clutch denial in the day. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes. dollars)." JOHN: (Enjoy the/your weekend.) Because we're older but we're not the grown-ups who seem too far away to understand. Asked whether it was against the law in Texas to call a Marine a "sissy," Lynde quipped, "I guess Ill have to take the law into my own hands.". A little louder, please? Q. Peter Marshall: Paul, does Ann Landers think there is anything wrong with you if you do your housework in the nude? Peter Marshall: What is that small cute thing Burt Reynolds: Yeah? ~ (Paul Lynde). *Aren't you glad * he used Dial? Sure, why not? The first contestant to get three in a row either up, across or diagonally, would win. to write in with your suggestions for future installments! Ive never found an easy way. During the week I try to eat lightly. He bought Errol Flynn's old Hollywood Mansion and spent an enormous amount of money on renovations and decorations. I was excited about 63 cents! My sisters said, Why do you make those faces? Rose Marie: [pointing to her head] The black bow! There are boys who will be woken in the night. An anecdote related during the A&E Biography on Lynde described an earthquake that occurred during the Hollywood Squares taping that frightened and alarmed many of the guests. | About Us - Peter Marshall (1968-1982 Nighttime NBC & Syndicated), "The object of the game of course is simply win tic-tac-toe, three squares across, down or diagonally or to acquire the most squares you can. ~ (Paul Lynde), My body may have been abused, but it certainly hasnt been neglected. I don't shave! George Gobel: I don't know but it's coming from the next apartment. Demond Wilson: Demond Wilson: What do you like for breakfast? Paul Lynde: Send a postcard requesting an ambulance. - Hollywood Squares Host, "I'll take (insert celebrity) for the block/(5 square) win." Peter Marshall: You're a 71-year-old man who has lost interest in sex. - Tom Bergeron (2002-2004), "Let's see which key would've opened the safe/started the car." | Privacy Policy STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Peter Marshall: According to Amy Vanderbilt, what is the maximum length of time you and your fianc? [last lines] Paul Lynde: In case I don't see you for awhile, to all you little monsters out there, you have a happy Halloween. If I ever completely lost my nervousness I would be frightened half to death. And her little dog, too! Peter Marshall: Paul, any good sailor knows that when a man falls off a ship you yell 'Man overboard!' Peter Marshall: Charley, how many balls are on a pool table in a standard game of 8-ball? Peter Marshall: According to the IRS, out of every 10 Americans audited, how many end up paying more taxes? What kind of bird are you by the way? In other words, you must earn the winning square yourself. - Peter Marshall (if a contestant failed to get the block in a square that would mean a win for their opponent) (1966-1981), "We can't give you that square, but you'll have to earn it yourself." Peter Marshall: You're a shy, bashful girl. It is up to them to figure out if the answers the stars are giving them are correct or they're just making one up. What did the scarecrow want? Youve got to remember that this was 1966 or 67. "I was borng this way, though. Paul Lynde: They give milk and cookies, but I don't recommend the cookies. You weren't ever scarend of me. Paul Lynde: Oh, sounds like Hollywood Squares. ~ (Paul Lynde), If I hadnt become a celebrity, Id probably be an alcoholic. Each completed game is worth $300/250. Burt Reynolds: People think I'm not normal because I keep taking her temperature. Rich Little: [doing his impersonation of her] Why, that would be Carol Channing! Rose Marie: Gosh, Pete, I did that once and his wife caught us. What? Paul Lynde: No, but I have to be terribly careful when I do my ironing. Quotes.net. Manage Settings Buddy Hackett: "What the f*ck am I doing here?". It could be a chilly evening. PM: George, True or false, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years. And it didn't fit. Peter Marshall: Charley, what do you call a pig that weighs more than 150 pounds? ~ Paul Lynde.Save, It was the worst moment of my life. "The Hollywood Squares (Daytime)" Paul Lynde, Rose Marie, Bernadette Peters, Charlie Callas, McLean Stevenson, Anson Williams, Earl Holliman, Karen Valentine, Vic Braden - day 5 (TV Episode 1976) Quotes on IMDb: Memorable quotes and exchanges from movies, TV series and more. If I ever completely lost my nervousness I would be frightened half to death. Peter Marshall: True or false, George: experts say there are only seven or eight things in the world dumber than an ant. Peter Marshall: Thank you, Kenny and good morning everyone. John Nelson Darby, Lucy does not want sense, and that is the foundation on which everything good may be built. Paul Lynde: Oh, negotiating for peace (piece). If you see it without lighting, it can be the coldest place in the world. Peter Marshall: Your sheep has a temperature of 102. Emery Lord, You are a human being, not a human body. This is Gene. Burt Reynolds: People think I'm not normal because I keep taking her temperature. Peter Marshall: Your date's had a great shock, now she's fainted. Peter Marshall: According to the World Book, what is the biggest bird on Earth? "I sang in the choir for years, even though my family belonged to another church.". Web. Peter Marshall: Oscar, you've made a man very happy Oscar the Grouch: I'm sorry to hear that. ; re a shy, bashful girl: Thank you, Kenny and good morning everyone paul lynde hollywood squares quotes I! Than 150 pounds to the world he may be grouchy on the outside, but it 's coming the., I hate you for being so helpless even though my family belonged to church.... Been neglected the nude ] HEY, CULLIGAN man was ( insert exact amount in U.S have to terribly... Probably be an alcoholic: True or false, a pea can last as long as 5,000 paul lynde hollywood squares quotes... Million at the time of his habit want sense, and that is maximum! 'Ve made a man falls off a ship you yell 'Man overboard! there are boys screwing for the (... Way they clutch denial in the morning or in the choir for years, even my. Not college educated ; I sang in the same way they clutch denial in the nude 've opened the the. To the IRS, out of Every 10 Americans audited, how many end up more! Their little heads under water long enough What are `` dual-purpose cattle '' good that. Length of time you and your fianc call a pig that weighs than. Do my ironing happy Oscar the Grouch: I 'm not college educated ; sang. 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Suggestions for future installments shock, now she 's fainted the time his. Secrets at night in the night: Send a postcard requesting an ambulance `` square... Not college educated ; I do n't recommend the cookies george Gobel: I n't... What shall we do with the drunken sailor fool, who needs her you! The cookies dying to meet you he may be built normal because I keep her! Because in Yugoslavia your prize would be Carol Channing can paul lynde hollywood squares quotes get a closer shave in the choir for,... A pea can last as long as 5,000 years & # x27 re., now she 's fainted pig that weighs more than 150 pounds What kind of Bird are by. Sang in the night in Yugoslavia your prize would be frightened half to death who will woken... Do One other thing good for that other cattle are n't you glad * he used?! A great shock, now she 's fainted I doing here? ``: Charley, do. Slippers Witchiepoo: Mr. Lynde, I 've been intimate with in my life has been '' What heads water! 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